Monday, December 20, 2010

What I Read Today - Monday December 20, 2010

From: An email from Brenda (from the web site

Being the only man at a women’s conference.

December 6, 2010

Last Saturday, I did something I’ve never done before. I attended a Christian women’s conference. And I’m not talking about falling on the estrogen grenade and hanging out with my wife and 100 other women at a local church. I went to Deeper Still, the super bowl of women’s conferences. Think 14,000 ladies. Think Kay Arthur and Beth Moore. Think Jon Acuff on the 15th row.

It was a wild experience and as a guy, a gentleman really, I brought back 9 observations about what goes on at Christian women’s conferences:

1. There will be at least 1 “husbands don’t help out around the house,” joke.

This one made me sweat a little. At one point one of the speakers made a joke about how men don’t do enough housework and I swear, I felt like every eye in that stadium was on me. I grabbed a broom from a janitor’s closet right then in an attempt to appease the crowd.

2. Kay Arthur will talk about sex.

I was there for a panel discussion. Someone in the audience asked a question about sex. Kay Arthur, the esteemed 70ish Bible expert, dropped some bombs in response. My favorite? She said that men are having a hard time with the recession and feeling inadequate. One of the ways wives can make them feel better about the recession is with sex. I am not making this up. Me and the other 4 men in the building stood up and cheered this comment.

3. A pastor will have to make the world’s most awkward transition.

David Platt, the author of the fantastic book “Radical,” was asked to close with a prayer right after Kay Arthur talked about sex. That’s a tough act to follow, but Platt crushed it. What did he say? He got up and said, “Kay Arthur, I’ve never been so happy for the recession. I hope it never ends.” Hilarious.

4. Priscilla Shirer will bring it like Chuck D from Public Enemy

Good grief, that Priscilla Shirer was on fire. I only caught a couple minutes of her but she absolutely destroyed that stage. Wow. I thought at the end she’d just drop the mic like Eminem at the end of 8 mile and walk off. Great stuff.

5. Young ladies will be told not to dress like harlots and sexpots.

As a dad with two daughters sitting next to him, I wanted to say, “Amen!” to this point. I loved what I heard at the conference about women being proud and beautiful and not cheap. They cannot say this enough. I wanted to hug this conference at this moment.

6. Beth Moore will make you feel like family.

My wife got to hang out with Beth Moore after the event and she could not have been nicer. But I promise, there’s not a lady in that crowd that didn’t feel loved by Beth Moore. Want to make your wife happy this Christmas? Get her a Beth Moore book. LL Cool J’s name stands for “Ladies Love Cool James. I am no longer calling Beth Moore, Beth Moore. From now on, I will be referring to her as “LL Cool B,” because Ladies Love Beth.

7. Ladies will wave money.

At one point they about talked raising money for a girl in the crowd. In about 4.2 seconds, ladies had dollar bills whipped out and waving in the air. That is awesome and something you will never, ever see at a men’s conference. No guy in a flannel shirt with a beard is getting out a dollar, waving it above his head and yelling, “We can do it!”

8. There were zero Braveheart references.

I didn’t see any Gladiator clips either. Come to think of it, no one mentioned the Matrix.

9. Clothes will be mentioned.

One of the questions from the crowd was about a jacket that one of the speakers was wearing. As a boy, I’ve never thought, “What kind of pants is Andy Stanley wearing? I like the cut of his gib! And that mock turtleneck on Rick Warren, is that from the Maxx?”

I had an awesome time at the conference even though I was only there for about an hour. I was blown away at what Lifeway, the speakers and a stadium of ladies were up to. That point about the recession alone was worth it’s weight in gold. I’ll be back, I’ll go again and I promise to take notes, because they were bringing it.

Have you ever been to a women’s conference?

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